So It's Valentines Day
POSTED AT 03:46 PM in My Life and what's left of it...

What has changed in my so-called "lovelife" after a year? Right, absolutely nothing! It's still boring and bland. Hmmm... I guess I should start calling it "lovedeath" instead. Harharhar! Now that's pathetic isn't it?

But who needs a man when I have my family and my little baby to make me happy? I know you'll say. "Yeah right! You're just saying that, but deep inside you, you're still hoping you're with a man who loves you." Ok! Ok! Maybe at the back of my mind I wanted that, but take note of the word "wanted" not "needed". Meaning, I can live without it! 

Amen!

It's been years. Yup, years of living a "single" life and yet I feel happy and blessed without a man in my life.  Hey! Men gave me nothing but heartbreaks and headaches in the past and I am telling you, I don't miss that life at all! What do you expect???

So here's a big HAPPY VALENTINES DAY to all lovers out there who are fortunate to find their match.  As for me, I'm satisfied with giving (and taking) some lovin' from my family and my precious little bundle of joy.

Have fun!

Listening to: I Need To Be In Love by The Carpenters
Feeling: satisfied

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Remembering Dianne, remembering Cebu
POSTED AT 08:43 PM in My Life and what's left of it..., The World, People

Buzz!

Someone buzzed me on my messenger last week. When I saw that it was Mike, my heart started to beat really fast. What could Mike possibly want from me? He asked me about the baby on my profile picture. "Yours?" I proudly said "Yes". We were "silent" for a moment. Then I asked the inevitable question. "How's Dianne?" Mike said "I thought you'll never ask, she's fine, thanks... Oh wait, boss call, be right back"

With Mike, coming and going like that, I found myself contemplating about the past. I remembered Dianne, remembered our days in Cebu, remembered the fun we shared... We used to go to the mall together and shop till we drop, go to the beach and swim our hearts out and even play volleyball during weekends. She always come and watch me perform in the lobby of a hotel where I used to sing. She'll stay until the wee hours and then we'll roam around the hotel's casino to watch people lose their money over several games -- baccarat, blackjack, craps, poker, roulette and even machine slots. We didn't have much money to gamble then so we just enjoy ourselves watching other people play.

It's strange. I felt strange to have thoughts of Dianne these days. It's been almost 2 years since I saw her. We parted with bitterness. I am still nursing the pain that she caused me (I'll tell you all about it when I'm ready). I think I'm ready to face her as I have forgiven her long long time ago... but, sigh! Will she ever swallow her pride and make things good between us?

My fingers are crossed.

Feeling: blank

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I'm not much into Gaming...
POSTED AT 12:18 PM in My Life and what's left of it..., The World, People

...even if online games seem to be tempting.

I've been using a computer since my high school days but I never came to like computer games that much. I use the computer for research, word processing and other school-related projects. Then I came to like computer arts and designing, I started creating and printing invitations for birthdays and weddings.

There are times though that I came to envy those who enjoy playing games online because they seem to enjoy what they're doing. I heard they even grow addicted of such games, that they tend to forget their problems. Sigh, I wanted one that will help me forget my problems right now. Something that isn't that difficult to do. I can turn to my writing, but that would entail intellect, I may need to think much, I don't like that. Maybe online games like online racing, online puzzles, online casinos, online adventures, among others can help. Maybe I should look into online gaming and lose myself into it. I badly needed a diversion right now. I need to forget my problems while enjoying at the same time.

Sigh... Problems, problems, problems... when will they stop coming? It's playtime!

Feeling: bored

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